The question I get asked most
People ask me all the time what it's really like living in Paris as a Black American woman. Some ask with excitement. Some ask with worry. Most are quietly picturing their own lives here and wondering if they would belong.
I've lived in Paris for more than a decade, I'm now a dual citizen, and I've been helping women move to France since 2018. So I'll answer the way I wish someone had answered me before I came: honestly, and from experience.
Paris has given me a beautiful life. It has also asked me, again and again, to figure out where I fit. And the hardest part of the whole move was making a huge decision with no one beside me who had already done it.
Living a fully French life
For most of my years here, my life has been deeply French. My neighborhood, my work, my vacations and my closest friends all sit inside French culture.
France expects you to adapt, and I learned early that the more I embraced the language, the rhythm and the etiquette, the more doors opened for me. That immersion is a big part of why my life here works so well.
It also comes at a cost that few people mention. The more fully I settled into French life, the more I found myself craving my own culture: the food, the humor, the music and the shorthand of being around Black Americans who just get it.
Straddling two worlds
I'm from the Bay Area, where Black pride runs deep. I'm also a woman who has built her adult life in Paris. Holding both of those identities at once is one of the most rewarding and most isolating parts of expat life.
There are moments in Paris when I feel like the only one in the room who shares my story. Then there are moments back home when people assume that loving French life means I've left part of myself behind. I haven't. I've just grown into someone who belongs to two places.
If you're considering a move, know this in-between feeling is normal. It's also much easier to carry when you're surrounded by women who understand it firsthand.
Why community decides whether you thrive
After years of watching women make this move, I'm convinced community is the deciding factor. It shapes how confident you feel making the decision, long before you ever land.
Most women I talk to are deep in research alone. They're up at 3am comparing neighborhoods, reading forums and second-guessing every step. That isolation is what makes the decision feel so heavy.
The women who land softly are the ones who stop doing it alone. They talk to people who have already made the move, they ask the questions they're embarrassed to ask, and they arrive knowing where their people are. That's why I host rendez-vous in Paris and the Bay Area, and why community is built into everything I do.
Luxury on my own terms
For me, luxury has always meant my time and the freedom to do what I want, when I want. It means having a home in Paris and in New York. It means a life that lets me move between countries because my life calls for it, and options I've created for myself around the world.
I've been told more than once that choosing this kind of life means I'm trying to be someone else. I see it differently. Ease, beauty and access belong to me as much as anyone, and I get to define what they look like.
What does luxurious living mean to you? I ask every woman I work with, because the answer shapes where she should live, how she can land softly and what her life in France should feel like.
Black women are thriving abroad
I'm far from the only one living this way. Some of the women I admire most are Black American women who have built lives of ease on their own terms. Many are my clients, my subscribers and women I've met for coffee in Paris.
They are well traveled, multilingual and building wealth. They're choosing softness, rest and beauty, and they're doing it with confidence. Every one of them reminds me that a life like this is available to us.
If you've been wondering whether there's a place for you in Paris, there is. And there's a community of women here ready to welcome you.
You don't have to figure this out alone
If you're feeling overwhelmed by the idea of moving to France, it's a sign you're doing something huge without anyone beside you who has already done it. That's the gap I built Paris Chic Code to close.
Every move I guide is built on the S.O.F.T. Landing Framework™, my method for evaluating your specific profile across four proprietary dimensions. It's how I help women land softly in France, with a plan built around their life instead of a template.
There are two ways to start:
A Readiness Session. If you want personal guidance on your own move, book a session with me. We'll take a full look at where you are today, and afterward you'll receive a Strategic Portfolio with my recommendations for your move. Book here.
The Paris Lifestyle Vision Workbook. If you'd like to start on your own, my workbook helps you get clear on the life you want in France before you plan the move. Get the workbook.
Wherever you are in the decision, I'd love to help you make it with clarity, confidence and community. And if you'd like more stories like this one, subscribe to my writing here on the website.
Toujours Avec Élégance,
Latrice Darlène
